Match Report – vs Wrotham, 5th July 2009

Well, here it is, the first match report of 2009.  I’d almost forgotten all about this blog malarkey – we’ve played a few games this season already, but no wins.  But all that changed today – history was indeed made, and all the history books will say is ‘Kings Hill beat Wrotham’.  In fact, if you have a history book at home, just throw it away – it’s worthless.  All books about history will now have to be re-written, because ‘Kings Hill beat Wrotham’.  And here is our story.

Last season was a washout, literally.  We all turned up in spitting rain, decided to brave it, and Wrotham batted for a few overs.  We decided to give in when we saw an Otter in a liferaft, and no further cricket was played that day.  I seem to recall downing a few beers afterwards, and getting home at midnight, but thats another story altogether.  So on to 2009′s fixture.

It was a beautiful day – sun shining brightly in the sky, hardly a breeze, and the afternoon was primed for a history-making (jesus, enough already – ed) game of cricket.  Kings Hill decided to field first, and we were off.  Peter opened the bowling attack in partnership with Guy B – surely the wickets would flow like the Merrydown cans of the spectators (see later).  It was a cautious opening, with Wrothams Batsmen getting their eye in on a fairly quick wicket and outfield.  Guy took some time to get the line and length, but got there around 40 on the scoreboard, when the first opportunity came to young Anthony – an easy catch surely!  But no – he dropped it, and the assembled crowd quickly noted how the ball was fizzing and spinning in the air like a fish on the hook (or something, I don’t know, I’m just trying to make the lad feel better).  In fairness, it looked like an easy catch and he missed it – we’ve all done it!

Peter threw some excellent bowling into the mix – and the scoring seemed to be taking an age.  The corridor of uncertainty had opened for business, and there were a fair few balls bowled into it, but the wily Wrotham openers held their nerve.

When finally the first wicket came, it was indeed a relief.  Skipper had come in to bowl and things started to come to life – a great catch from Miners, superb stops from ‘Chris’ mate Bernie’ and further wickets fell.  We dropped a couple more catches, of course, but thats just how we roll.  Wrotham exhausted their alloted time for 174 – 5.

A tea was had, including the rare but welcome sight of the classic cheese and onion butty, coupled with what appeared to be home made brownies. Lush, as I think they say in Wales.

Jackson and Shutt were out to open, and the assembled crowd were fearful.  Would Shutt be out first ball, as he had been unluckily earlier in the season?  Would Garys ‘Chris Gayle’ style of batting see us through to a good start?  Collective gasps were unnecessary, as Wrotham appeared to be out of regular bowling attackers, and a buffet was laid on for the eager Shutt and Jackson.  They had to order extra boots at one stage, because the others were too full.  Both sailed past 50, Shutt being the first to succumb at (can’t remember – 70?), and celebrating by falling over a chair on the way back to the pavilion.  Jackson battled on, until he too succumbed to over-exhuberance and trudged back on 60ish.  Peter and Brian kept us going to the total – a win for Kings Hill by 9 wickets, I think we’ll find.

Of course, we played it cool – we always expect to win!  But win we did, and even having a drunk on the field at one stage merely added to the sense of occasion.  All back to the pub whose name I can’t remember for beer!

Ah – the sound of leather on willow, the sweet taste of fine ale washed down with victory.  It’s like a fantasy as imagined by John Major.

A win!  Onwards and upwards – chaaaarrrrgggggeeee!!!

 

Match Report – KHCC Vs Frittenden – Sunday 21st September 2008

It’s a beautiful ground, Frittenden.  Surrounded by fields with cows and sheep in them, there is nothing visible that reminds you that you’re in the 21st Century – you could almost be in the 1800′s, and playing cricket in times where there was no such thing as motor cars, telephones, BlackBerries, and, perhaps, the LBW rule.  It is truly a stunning ground.

And so, on to the match.  As it was last year, the sun was shining brightly, and there wasn’t a breeze to trouble us.  I don’t know if we won the toss or not, but Frittenden were out to bat first.  We had nine, they had ten, but nothing was stopping all enjoying a great day of cricket, except perhaps the pesky LBW rule.

A limited overs (35) match, the emphasis was on scoring.  Frittenden started brightly, but their first wicket fell at c21 runs up.  There was some excellent bowling on display from our two ‘ringers’, I call them ringers, but ‘best bowlers’ might be more appropriate – fine bowling from Alex and Will all innings, to be fair.  Wickets were dropping like flies – stumps rattled at the hands of Kevin, Alex and Will, and even Jamie’s ‘eccentric’ bowling claimed a wicket – I think he planned to have every over with a mixture of no-balls, wides, and wickets!  It worked though – we were doing OK at the 20 over mark.  Sadly, their most competent batsmen seemed to appear later in their innings, and despite some further excellent bowling from our men on the day, and a superb one left handed diving catch at slip from, er, ahem, me – (alright, it wasn’t that good!), they ended their 35 overs at 162.  Special mention for committed keeper Gravenell, who made a splendid high catch that would probably have had his eye out if he’d missed it!

We went in to bat after a terrific tea – the combination of pizza slices, Twixes and jam tarts was irrestible.  Robinson and Orme opened the batting, and looked very settled – Orme snatched at some buffet bowling and was caught, much to his chagrin.  He looked as though he could have been there all day, too.

Hollyhomes and Gravenell were 3rd and 4th, and played some excellent cricket, scoring 22 and 21 respectively – again they looked very comfortable and probably would have been there all day (if that were possible!).  Frittenden recognised this, I think, and Gravenell was unfortunate to be bowled by what appeared to be their fastest bowler (it was a slow wicket though – hard to tell).  I was 5th, LBW decision at 0 bravely given by our very own umpire Orme – despite my dirty looks I was bang to rights.

Robinson was playing beautifully however, stroking the ball all over the ground.  Despite a well placed field, Peter seemed to plant the ball exactly where he wanted it – no matter who the bowler was.  Some excellent boundaries ensured he saw out the match, with the lions share of our runs.  Sadly, our runs dried up a bit towards the final overs – the excellent Will stoically defending his wicket – Boycott would approve – but we finished up well short at 124 with all our overs played.

So thatsa it – the last match of the season.  It’s a great fixture, Frittenden – a friendly side, lovely ground, superb tea and cold Beer in abundance – I am looking forward to 2009′s match already!

See you in the nets!

 

Match Report – KHCC Vs West Peckham – 31st August 2008

Despite reports of thunderstorms, heavy rain, and generally late summer English weather, the game was all set to start bang on time at 1.30.  Even the sun came out to welcome the visitors to the very beautiful West Peckham ground, which in addition to being hilariously picturesque, has the fine attraction of a pub brewing its own booze right next to the pitch – what more could you ask for!  I’m sure that even if the pub wasn’t there, and the ground wasn’t so attractive, it would still be a great team to play.  Definitely.

Anyhow, on with the match.  We lost the toss, and fielded first.  It was a much revised team – some new faces, a talented youngster in Alex Orme, and the general shape of the side was good.  We weren’t massively over-endowed with bowlers, but with our ace batting, the result would be a formality, surely!  Err, those of us who remember last season would know this to be wrong – West Peckham are very useful and are, well, lets say ‘competitive’.  And so it proved.

Jackson and Buller opened the bowling, with Ambanpola as ‘keeper, replacing the regular Gravenell.  Their opening batsman aren’t too shabby, and quickly started racking up runs.  At around the 50 mark a glorious chance came the way of yours truly at slip, but these old bones aren’t what they used to be and it was round my ankles anyway, alright?  Dropped catch number one.

More solid bowling, but more whacking around their ground followed – and further dropped catches followed too.  Yours truly, again, and Chris Edgar – with a perfect waist height one, that he fumbled like a teenager undoing a bra strap.  Amusing, but a disappointment.

First wicket came LBW, but by then the home team were 100-up.  Once we had removed the top 4 batsmen, with some excellent bowling from all concerned, notably the youngster Orme who played a blinder – bowling and batting, it has to be said – we were looking to keep the score respectable.  We didn’t though – more dropped catches (Marc and Gary!) ensured we were gifting them runs.  A hamstring injury to Steve, the newcomer, added to our woes.  I won’t ‘bayonet the dead’ any longer – they managed 284-8, and at tea things looked bleak.  They did perk up a bit with the cakes though.

The clouds had gathered over us before we had even polished off the butties, and our innings began warily – with the opener Miners stoically defending their quick bowler, (who also batted third).  Orme also opened, and played some nice shots around the ground, which eventually helped him on to 32, our top scorer by some margin.  Miners eventually fell, our 3rd batsman Jamie was out for a golden duck, bowled cleanly by their fast bowler, and I managed one run before falling victim to a fielding change and a ball that was ‘just there to be hit’.  One day I’ll play defensively, but just not yet…

It’s fair to say our wickets fell like scottish drunks on a bank holiday, i.e. very frequently, and even dependable, top order batsman fell for small totals – Ambanpola for 2, Jackson for a highly unusual 0. Newcomer Chris Edgar fell for 0, following Potts down the ‘shit or bust’ route of wild swinging.  A runner was called into play for the injured newcomer Steve, and he managed 6.  So, it was a bit of a washout really – we finished all out for 50ish (I couldn’t bear to even look at the final score), and beer was taken by most, firstly to be sociable but frankly to drown a sorrow or two.

Next up – Town Malling.  We were beaten by 4 runs last year (4 runs!), so next weeks game should be a little brighter for KHCC.

We had fun, anyway.

 

Match Report – Wrotham CC – 6th July

This will be a short one (which makes a change from my innings!).

It was raining heavily throughout the day, and despite the BBC telling us that the rain would disappear between 1 and 4, it didn’t look that way when we rocked up at 2.  Suffice to say, it was bucketing down.

Wrotham declared themselves ‘very keen to play’ though, so out we trudged in the rain, and warmed up in the pouring rain, as only extremely damp and largely unfit middle-aged blokes know how.  After what seemed like an age of warming (wetting?) up, it was apparent that the batsmen from Wrotham had a different meteorological view, and they remained dry and safe in the pavilion.  In we trudged.

Back out again 20 mins later, everyone agreed we should play on through – the two openers for Wrotham made a bright start, largely down to the ball being slippier than an eel covered in olive oil – a good delivery from Guy should have resulted in a catch, but it slipped agonisingly from the clutches of the diving Gravenell, and past the gaze of, erm, Guy’s Dad.  Oops, sorry son.

With the score at 30-0 it started to get even wetter, and with a look of soggy resignation, we all trudged back to the pavilion to dry off.

So, no result there.  Wrotham looks like a lovely place to bash the ball about though, but only when the sun is out!

Onwards – to the amusingly named Higham and Mockbeggar!

 

Match Report – Wateringbury CC – 29th July 2008

I haven’t got the scorebook, and my memory is worse than a sieve, but I thought I would have a quick pop at a match report for our illustrious victory over Wateringbury, so here goes.  Please feel free to post commentary to the contrary, but I’d be very upset if anyone doesn’t remember my first century.

It was a quality team on the day – although we had lost Miles (who had almost single-handedly beaten Addington the week prior), we had a secret weapon in the form of Aussie Adam Riddett.  We had a full complement of 11, committed, quality players, all with their own equipment and marbles.  Although a little changeable, the weather was fine, and incredibly bright at times, so the afternoon was primed for some quality cricket.

Winning the toss, Wateringbury batted first, and it’s fair to say they had a fairly tough time against the pace and accuracy of Riddett, who forced a number of maiden overs in the first part of their innings.  Our fielding was energetic, and the catches that eventually came were spectacular – an edge to slip from a fierce delivery from Riddett was beautifully caught by Ambanpola, a huge lob that formed a small eclipse in Neil Miners eyes was well held, and even your truly got in on the action with a catch at cover, following an expertly weighted delivery from the excellent Riddett, who took 5 for a-small-amount-I-can’t-remember.

Wateringbury – all out for 100.

After a splendid tea we were off again – stiocal defending from Brian frustrated the bowlers, excitable hacking from others (ahem) producing little result.  A very slow run rate was causing much anxiety all the way up to 50, when tensions eased as the runs started to come a little faster.  In all fairness, the batting performance of the century was on display from Miners, who defended, swatted for singles, and hit a delicious boundary to give everyone comfort after a splendid 18 left us very close indeed to the hundred.  It came shortly before the 10th over after 6.30, when 101 was achieved with (I think) 6 wickets spare, and 10 overs.

A well-worked and deserved victory – MOTM for me has to be Miners, simply for the contrast to the previous matches, where 0* seemed to be part of his surname, although Riddett’s bowling has to go down as the best we’ve seen, with perhaps the exception of Miles.

Onwards and upwards – bring on Wrotham!

 

First 2008 win inspires blog shocker!

Given that we achieved our first win, I thought I’d set up some kind of online blog thing so that we can broadcast this fabulous news, and our myriad future victories, to the world!